Friday, July 27, 2012

A Mormon Walks into a Bar...

Mormons don't drink. I am a Mormon. Therefore, I haven't spent too much time hanging out in bars. So, when a bunch of ladies from my neighborhood decided to have a girls night out at Duke's Ale House, I felt a little uncomfortable. Well, it was more like a lot of uncomfortable. The knot I felt in my stomach was familiar but I couldn't place where I had felt it before until suddenly it hit me: junior high school. It was just like my first day at junior high!  I was excited and nervous; there were a lot of unknowns and plenty of peer pressure. My goal in both situations: don't look stupid.

Surprisingly, once I had identified where I had felt that way before, I felt a whole lot better. Mainly because I recognized that nothing bad had happened at junior high, everything had gone just fine. I even opened my locker on the first try.

For the record; everything went just fine at the bar too. I watched how other people ordered and paid for their drinks at the bar and viola, before I knew it I had a $2.50 rootbeer in my hand. We had a good time; these ladies...were hilarious. Raising children demands a sense of humor, as does being married. Every time I hang out with other women, whether they have a drink in their hand or they are stone cold sober, I always leave with less stress and a face that aches from laughing so much. Alcohol doesn't make people funny; life does.

The only time it isn't fun to hang out with other women, is when one of them is heck-bent on gossiping. Then, I don't care how much you drink or don't drink, you've just emptied the fun right out of the room. Thankfully, that doesn't happen very often anymore. Maybe that's because we're all older and more mature now or maybe it could be that shows like "Dance Moms" have made us all realize how stupid we look when we're being catty. Either way, I'm just glad when civility is the choice of the day.

I did notice, however, (and I don't know if this is just my Mormon perspective or if everyone saw it) that unless you're with people at a's a very depressing place to be. I watched the loners. I felt so sad for them. This was the best they could do? Music that was way too loud blaring in their ears, huge television screens demanding your attention everywhere you turned, and really expensive alcohol. It was like: how many other ways can we help you not feel? How many other ways can we keep you disconnected from the life that is happening all around you? They may as well have been sitting there with a bag over their head. Very sad; but score one for the devil!

1 comment:

  1. Dave and I have some very good friends that invite us regularly to their events, and most of their guests drink at these events. They are very protective of us, providing us unlimited 7Up and orange juice. The parties are quite fun, lots of talking and laughing ... until. There is a certain moment when the jokes stop being funny and some guests have gone beyond "social" drinking. And, at that point, we leave. Without fail, our comment to each other runs along the lines of how much we like these people sober, and wish they liked themselves sober, too.