I'll admit, I haven't always been happy about that; about being the rebound. In fact at one time I had sworn it off completely. I became a big believer in Dr. Joy Browne's One-Year Rule. But then I met him. He was neck deep in the rebound stage, yet so hopelessly irresistible. This one was going to hurt like hell but I knew I'd rather be his rebound than his nothing.
So I tried to look at rebounds in a new way: when a relationship ends we are left holding a bunch of feels that we aren't quite sure what to do with. There used to be someone else there who not only created those feels with us but helped carry them as well. Now we're left holding them all by ourselves. It makes all the difference to have someone special in our life to help reorganize/carry them through this difficult time. This picture that my son made illustrates what I mean:
Of course, we can't ignore the fact that while you are playing this noble role of "human anesthetic" for another person...you have just opened yourself up to getting hurt. But then again...anytime you are someone's anything you are probably going to get hurt! That's why it is so important to go into relationships with eyes open, especially when one of you is recovering from a recent break-up. Expectations do most of the driving and all of the damage in relationships.
So, why would you EVER want to be someone's rebound? You don't. But you will probably do it anyway, especially if you are the least bit optimistic, adventurous, romantic and best of all...horny.
Buckle up, baby. It's gonna be a bumpy ride. Enjoy it!
1 - Mary C. Lamia Ph.D. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/intense-emotions-and-strong-feelings/201309/rebound-relationships
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