Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Don't Look Down

Last night while I was helping my daughter with her homework, I looked down at her worksheet and saw some of my hair laying on it that hadn't been there two seconds ago. I decided it was time. So for family home evening, instead of playing 'Balderdash' or 'Sorry', we played 'Sorry You're Bald'.

I thought the kids would find this quite entertaining, but they were actually rather somber. No one wanted a turn. We stopped shaving at mohawk stage and tried to tease it up for a picture to commemorate my good ol' punk days, but every time we pulled a spike up to rat and spray it, it just came out in our hands.

Everything was going well, I understood what had to be done...just like every other weird thing I've been through since March 27th. But then I looked down. I saw ALL my beautiful hair laying in a pile on the floor. Have you ever considered how much time and emotional energy you (women) put into your hair? (not to mention money), it was more than I could handle and I had to choke back the tears until I could run upstairs to my room. Mirrors met me everywhere and my good ol' friend denial was no where to be found.

Fortunately, my good ol' friend Mark was to be found and he stayed with me all night, through each emotional twist and turn. Don't know what I'd do without him. I love you Mark.
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22 comments:

  1. Oh Rosey. I love you so much. Wish I were closer.

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  2. I am amazed by you. Your strength, your faith, your love, just all of you. I send all my love every every every day. I'm sorry you are going through this....no one should have to, especially not you. Love you!

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  3. ps, I can't figure out how to change my name on here....vogelagogo is me....Lesley

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  4. I'm a friend of Amy's and I just want to say how brave and beautiful you are, bald or not!! I'm sorry you have to lose it. Your attitude is amazing!

    My grandmother went through lots of chemo, and I actually thought she was very cute bald. She, my mom and I went out shopping one day and about halway there we realized we forgot her wig and just laughed and laughed. Just think of all the hairstyles you can pick from:)

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  5. I don't even know what to say except I'm sorry. XOXO

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  6. Maybe you could make bald the new style. I know
    I despise the time I have to take to mess with my hair. Wonder if the women in our ward would
    go bald with you? Wonder if their husbands would let them. We could be called "Rosemary's bald warriors!" Mark is such a wonderful support for you, I am glad you have him...and your kiddos too. Sorry this has to be part of chemo. For you next movie there is an old Star Trek Movie with a beautiful model who plays her character bald. I'm not sure which one it is.
    "This too shall pass." love to you & your family

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  7. Anna-Marie posted the last comment, btw.

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  8. Oh, Rosemary, my eyes are welling up with tears for you. I just spent an hour reading all of your blog posts. (I haven't been to our ward since the end of March because of baby blessings in other wards, sickness, and then vacation - so I've been out of the loop.) You are so brave and so, so strong. You have no idea how many people, including me, look up to you. I'm so sorry you are going through all of this and that you have to lose your beautiful hair. I'm glad you have such a wonderful husband to help you through all of this. My heart goes out to you and your family. With love, Becky Manwaring.

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  9. Rosemary, you are a beautiful person. Inside and out. I think you will be beautiful with or without hair. (But I'm very sorry you lost it.)

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  10. I am also Amy's friend. I admire your courage and strength so much! Big hugs! Keep your faith strong!

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  11. I am also Amy's friend ;) My hair is nothing compared to the love I have for my sister. In a heart beat I would join the club. But you will look ravishing in your doo-wraps and I hear your nails will grow strong and beautiful.

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  12. Rosie, as you know my hair is soooooo very long and very RED. I have 2 ponytails that I cut off (one last year and one the year before) for Locks of Love. I wish I knew someone who could make you a long red wig. How cool would that be. Miss you, Pray for you, I love Mark too!!!! Mark thanks for caring for my dearest friend I have ever had!!!!

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  13. When I posted it posted under Todd's name. I just wanted to clear up any confussion. I'm Chanda:)

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  14. Hey girl you are still as beautiful as ever! You rock even through the tears! LUV You! Guys hang on! He knows every single painful, scary thing and He is right beside you!

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  15. I am crying also. Why do we feel such an attachment to hair. I guess it is one of the things we spend a lot of time on. By the way did you have a funeral for your dearly departed hair? Love you loads.

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  16. Wow. You are amazing. I am glad your family is such a support to you, and your comments about how Mark is supporting you, too, brought tears to my eyes. We will keep you-and your family-in our prayers.
    -Aerwyn (Peterson) Whitlock

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  17. Rose, you're beautiful no matter what. I'd grow you a long red (orange) wig but it might take years; I can't even keep my own mellon covered. You are in every prayer we offer. We love you Rosie!

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  18. I'm sorry. I love you. And you're right, this sucks, not stinks. Call me.

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  19. I don't have words really, just a full heart. I called my friend, Catherine, who lives in the DC area. She said she remembered you from her visit and when I told her I was doing the Race for the Cure in your honor, she asked me to run a minute for you, and to let you know that you are in her prayers as well. So, what that is... is two more people are linked to you in the only way we can be -- compassion and prayer. -- Andrea

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  20. Chanda forwarded your blog to me, hope you don't mind. I want you to know you are wonderful and brave and have beautiful teeth. Beautiful teeth are a much better beauty asset than hair. You can fool someone with a wig, but the bridge I've got isn't fooling anyone.
    You have made me a better mother today. After reading your blog, I am more patient and more aware of every moment. Thank you for that, Rose.

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